Occasionally lame. Generally Awesome.

"Occasionally lame, but generally awesome."
 
AWESOME VIDEOS! Animal Videos!

Posted 9/23/2004

Sponsors

DanielleHatch.com
BowsAndBands.com
Spokane Real Estate
CrazySaver.com
theHatchReport.com
ChairGuys.com
CwHatch.com
Chocolat Elegant
GenerallyAwesome2.com
I Love Brazil


Become a Sponsor





stumble!


Generally Awesome 2
Weasel Breath
I love New York t-shirt $5.99
Acquaintances & Friends

1 Cute Kitty Shirts & More
Shirts
Hats
Cards
Posters

I Love Brazil
Shirts
Hats
Cards
Posters


Educational Links
CwHatch.com

Cooties Outbreak at Local School


New York, NY The school year is in full swing again, and you and both know what that means, epidemic season! School officials at a local elementary school last Tuesday sent home a notice to parents to beware of a spreading malady, cooties! This outbreak of cooties it the first widespread infection of the season, and may end up being the worst of it’s kind.

“Last Friday at recess Billy told Suzie that she had cooties,” said third grader Emily Vaschez. “Then everybody caught it.”

Recess monitors told reporters that Suzie seems to have originated the infection. From there she spread the contagion to a nearby group of about 15 boys who were playing touch football. The boys in turn spread the illness to girls in the vicinity.

“The saddest part about all this is that incidence of widespread infections such as this one are completely preventable. Precautionary measures and education are the best way avoiding these types of occurrences. Ironically, I am the one who should have prevented this,” said the school's health teacher.

While there is no known cure for “cooties,” as the disease is commonly called, public health workers are hopeful that the outbreak can be contained. At the same time, however, members of the student body itself may have developed a vaccine for the illness.

This vaccine has been at the heart of a fiery conflict about proprietary claims over the “circle, circle, dot, dot” treatment. While most claim that the vaccine falls in the public domain, one young man is trying to assert his intellectual property rights in the matter.

“I was the one who came up with the key ingredient of the treatment, that being the rhyme repeated along with the gestures: ‘Circle, circle, dot, dot, now you have your cooties shot.’ Everyone knows I invented the rhyme and everyone knows the treatment is useless without it. They totally stole my idea,” said 9 year-old Brian Acres.

While there is no cure for cooties, it is not fatal. Symptoms include emitting the impression of being “gross” and “icky.” For some reason symptoms are only detectable by members of the opposite gender.







For rare animals from miniature rodeo bulls to coturnix quail visit www.HatchFarms.com

E-mail this link to friends!


RECENT

What does the sounds of silence look like?
October 24, 2013

Happy Thanksgiving Turkey Maze
November 22, 2012

Baby hanging Station
August 4, 2012

Justin Bieber Should Be Your Attourney
May 10, 2012

420 Designs or h2o Designs
March 31, 2012

Book Review: I Hate You, Kelly Donahue
February 11, 2012

Advice for Rich Brazilians
December 17, 2011

Bunk Desks
October 26, 2011

Book Review: When Parents Text: So Much Said, So Little Understood
September 2, 2011

Book Review: The Little Black Book of Big Red Flags
June 25, 2011

Obama V Osama
May 16, 2011

Quality Cabinets
May 11, 2011

Pink Bullets by the Shins
April 12, 2011



Amazon.com 100 Hot DVDs
CLASSIC

Funny 50 Cent & Eminem Humor
Nov. 07, 2005

Jedi Skills Tournament
Apr. 14, 2005

True Story About Puppies and Alcoholic Kitties
Aug. 10, 2004

The Real South Bronx (w/ video)
May 21, 2004



CONTACT US

_____________________________________________
_______ "Occasionally lame, but generally awesome."________
____________________________________________


Home | Comics | Humor | Archive | Photos | Pirates | Store


   
Skateboarding Videos
   
Awesome Chairs
   
Mesh Office Chairs
   
Leather & Ergonomic Office Chairs

All content ©www.GenerallyAwesome.com 2003-2024 Privacy | Disclaimer | Meet the Staff! | Contact Us | SEARCH | Advertise