New York, NY If there is one thing the last election showed us it is that the prevailing opinion in many states is not favorable towards same-sex marriage. Frankly, I could care less about the matter, one way or another. As resident of the apartment building directly behind the city morgue I have a more pressing concern on my mind. It is high time that we LEGALIZE GAY FUNERALS. Those dead homos are starting to pile up behind the morgue and dead people really creep me out.

Now the Christian right will say things like “those gays can rot in hell!” My reaction is “whatever, dudes, just don’t let them rot in the alley behind my apartment.”

The conservative members of the fashion elite argue against legalizing gay funerals for fear that the social order of black clothing at funerals will be overturned. They say things like “Do you want to see people in pink and rainbow colored outfits in our cemeteries?” My response is, “do you want to have these bodies moved to the alley behind your house?”

In closing I would just like to reiterate that we need to bury all those dead bodies, cause they are giving me the heeby-geebies.

For rare animals from miniature rodeo bulls to coturnix quail visit www.HatchFarms.com