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Q: Victoria’s Secret?
A: Underwear Proceeds Support Communist Cuba

Communist icon Fidel Castro makes a startling revelation.

Havana, Cuba In a shocking revelation Cuban leader Fidel Castro made public a very intimate piece of information about a mainstay of American retail. The announcement uncovered one of the most closely guarded mysteries of US consumerism—just what was Victoria’s Secret? Now we have the answer, her secret is that profits from her popular, upscale underwear line have gone and continue to go to Communist Cuba.

“It now appears that Victoria’s Secret has been giving a lift to Cuba’s sagging economy for years,” professor of Caribbean Economic Studies John H. Crabtree told GA via e-mail.

Others confirm that the underwear giant has been padding an otherwise flat fiscal outlook, thus making the small island nation seem more attractive to the international community.

“We have seen a far-flung cross-section of young people from across the globe who have become enamored with Cuba. Today’s announcement may change the feelings of at least some of those individuals,” Crabtree added.

While some are calling such measures treason, company representatives are saying that their only intention was to provide a solid foundation for Cuban society. Although many hold no hope for the lone Communist hold-out in the Western hemisphere, Victoria & company continue to have faith that this little country will someday blossom.

Victoria herself added, “Not everyone in this world has been equally endowed by Mother Nature. My entire life’s work has been dedicated to helping compensate for natural disadvantages and leveling the playing field.”

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