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Posted 09/20/2003

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One Fossil Watch Found, Other Still Missing

Photograph of the fossil watch found in New Mexico, thought to be from the stone age.

New Yok, NY (AP) Archaeologists announced last week the discovery of a fossil watch that appears to date back to the Stone Age. The watch was found last month during a dig at a site in the New Mexico desert east of Albuquerque.

The lead archeologist for the dig, Dr. John H. Crabtree, insists that the find in authentic. However, Dr. Crabtree, who was on the project as an interdisciplinary faculty exchange program from the paleontological linguistics department, has come under fire from other archaeologists.

“While a superficial examination might lead one to believe that this artifact is real, closer examination calls its authenticity into question. For, example, we notice that the markings denoting the hours are made in what is almost definitely Roman numerals, thus calling into question the determination that the find is from the Stone Age,” said Dr. Riley of the Royal Archaeological Society.

In response to these claims Dr. Crabtree insists, “These unfounded attacks on my scholarship have their roots in personal grudges. Dr. Riley is still jealous that I stole his wife from him and is letting that cloud his view.”

Both sides are awaiting the results of an independent third party examination of the artifact.

In a related story, two hours before making the announcement Dr. Crabtree received a phone call from 25 year old former intern Arwe Theryet trying to claim the watch. Mr. Theryet, who worked at the site over the summer, heard rumors that a fossil watch had been found.

“I thought I would call and see if I could claim it since I had lost my own Fossil watch there over the summer. I would not be so worried about it except that it was a graduation present from my grandma,” said Mr. Theryet. “But Dr. Crabtree said my description did not fit the watch they found. You see, mine was made out of aluminum, and this one was made out stone.”

Mr. Theryet added, “It had a blue face and an aluminum watchband as well. Inside the watch is inscribed the phrase ‘Dolce Et Decorum Est.’ If you find it please e-mail me at”

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